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Madameoiselle and Monsieur
10-30-05, 7:12 PM

In the subject line of an email, �Read using a voice of a southern gentleman� that followed with a message written using a calligraphy font:

Madameoiselle Cartier (similar but not actually her last name),

Monsieur (my last name) humbly requests the honor of your presence at his estate Saturday at seven p.m. for a culinary exploration reminiscent of a post-equestrian hound and fox hunt celebration on a crisp, Fall evening.

Following dinner, Monsieur (My last name) plans for your entertainment with the attendance at a local theatrical performance.

If acceptable to the Madameoiselle, please respond favorably in-kind.

With unbridled enthusiasm,

Monsier (My last name)


When you don�t have much money and you're trying to impress a woman, sometimes creativity is all it takes. My email was well-received and returned in the same vain of aristocratic language but with the sub-text of �...yea, a dinner and movie sounds great...!�

Luckily Friday night, I grocery shopped and purchased the ingredients akin to wild game such as Cornish Game Hens, long grain wild rice, cranberries, green beans, Cabernet wine, etc. � all the fixings for a hearty Fall meal. However, when I awoke at 5 a.m., for some ungodly known reason, I happened to be reading a cook book with a enticing photo of Beef Tenderloin and Ratatouille which stuck in my mind all throughout the morning as I was cleaning my bachelor pad from top to bottom. Everything had to work smoothly if I'm to win points with her.

Well, as the small birds, almost fist size, were defrosting, I kept thinking how impressive the photo of the sered tenderloin with pinkish centered enticed me and how all the ingredients were those liked by the Desired Girl � manily, garlic. Soon, I abandoned my Fox and Hound dinner and raced to the store tp purchase an additional $70 in ingredients for my revised dinner plans � all to impress and show the Desired Woman that I know how to cook.

My day was flying by and so was the time. I washed all the floors, cleaned the bathrooms, shopped, vacuumed, laundry, set the dining room table, and even managed to give the dogs a bath while preparing the food in advance for dinner. I saved some time by starting the marinate and finishing the appetizer of tuna stuffed roasted red peppers that were rolled to look like sushi, yet of French origin.

Pressed for time, I jumped in the shower and was dressing when the doorbell rang, throwing on pants and a shirt, I open the door still looping my belt around my waist. Down to the last second! In hind-sight, I was lucky I woke at five p.m.

�Welcome! Are you looking forward to dinner!�

�Absolutely! You make it sound an adventure.�

�I�m sorry to disappoint but I couldn�t pull-off the Hunter�s theme.�

�Is it a Pizza Hut night, then?�

�Tonight, I changed the menu in honor of your French heritage. Everything is French.�

�Really? I�m impressed. And a guy who knows how to cook?!�

(points!)

I then relayed my story as I brought her into the kitchen where she offered to help with the cooking but I relegated her to cutting the bread and making the salad...after she admitted that she wasn�t much of a cook. With the appetizers ready, I led her to the dinning room where the table was dressed with a scarlet red table cloth and accompanied with wine glasses, water goblets and dried flowers. Unmistakably missing was candlelight, however the conversation easily flowed over the first course, the second course and the main course. Undeniably, a restaurant couldn�t have created such an ambiance.

Retired to the family room for the �theatrical performance�, a DVD, I jokingly inquired, �With natural gas prices so high these days, are you fire place worthy? I mean, this would mean a hint of a big commitment on your part. I just don�t want to be a Saturday Night date guy and burning money up the chimney.� With a deeply passionate kiss, I thought her worthy enough of an artificial fire and lit the fire. Watching the fire dance and cast shadows, we occupied time.

Around 1 a.m. we caught our breaths and she reminded me, �You know, you still haven�t fed me my dessert.�

�Oh, I'm sorry! You don�t know how perfect this will go with the fire lit room.�

If you may recall on our first date, the Desired Girl stated, �There are two things to remember: one, you can never have too much garlic or never enough chocolate.�

Throughout the night, I made things with ingredients she liked as revealed throughout our previous dates such as garlic, ginger, certain vegetables, red wine, etc.

On a polished, silver circular tray covered with a layer of mint leaves rests a sunburst of strawberries arranged around a small serving cup of chocolate and a side of confectioners sugar with chocolate swirls. The idea of feeding each other strawberries struck me the day before as I�m trying to progress the relationship. Ply with chocolate and alcohol was an earlier theme of past dates and continued tonight as I popped open a bottle of Martine and Rossi Asti which, by pure dumb luck where I debated over type and brand to purchase, was a delicious accompaniment of flavors and playful excitement to sharing strawberries.

At the night progressed to two a.m., the Desired Girl decided it was time for her to leave as she has a dog at home to attend. Throughout our shadow dancing, I was denied new bold steps, as usual and predictable. So, I went through the motions of asking her to stay the night and full-well expecting a �no.�

�Yes.�

Startled, �Did you say, yes?�

�Yes.�

�Yes?�

�Yes.�

Yesterday - Tomorrow

Here we go again... - 10-06-10
fuck you. - 07-02-08
A new blog - 04-13-08
New site: The Running Bob - 03-16-08
Tax Man Encourages Hobbies? - 03-11-08
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