Hello again...second thoughts.
03-04-07, 10:13 PM

Hello, again.

Hello again, indeed. Yes, with my absence from Diaryland, I certainly kicked the day-blog habit, yet will any future entry provide greater insight to life? Probably not, because when it comes right down to it, I�m ordinary. Ordinary life. Ordinary pursuits. Ordinary desires. Ordinary faults.

Ordinary is good, right? Sure, it is. Yet, in my mind, I�m extraordinary! An affirmation? No way! It�s just my ego spouting-off validating my life and my decisions to not be fit in box or fall into a trap like so many others. I strive to test myself and take great pride in accomplishment and standing in the spotlight. I do crave the pat on the back and am humble when singled-out for a round of applause but, internally, I�m beaming with recognition.

Is this writing leading to an accomplishment? No...well, maybe. I might inject, though, I had some doubt on a project but in the end, a developer praised me during a meeting in front of twenty or so colleagues. I nodded my head in appreciation all the while beaming but, in the end, as in previous circumstances, I knew my work was thorough and beyond reproach. As a reward, my boss gave me a half day on Friday.

The fianc� and I went for Thai food and a mid-afternoon movie where I discovered movie theaters now provide a self-serve popcorn topping station with �butter flavoring� and a variety of powdered seasonings, Ranch now being my favorite. My new crack caused me to exit my seat during the film to pour, yes pour through spout, additional seasoning over the 3/4 full popcorn bag.

Prior to writing, I viewed my last entry where I longed to hear from past girlfriends. Sure enough, it wasn�t two weeks ago a former girl I casually dated, emailed me through classmates dot com. We dated a couple of times my sophomore year but didn�t pursue the relationship based upon her kissing technique � she liked to bite the bottom of my life until it bleed. My college roommate dated her as well and we compared notes after he appeared with fat lip in the morning. Although exotic in appearance and in bed, I painfully became aware she was not the one. Yet, I wondered what happened to her?

Landing in retail, she eventually met her husband through an ad campaign he was pitching to the company. She�s moved around the country, lived in New York for some time and now has two girls. I learned she runs marathons as well and we�ll meet in Chicago next fall with the old gang. Well, not really my gang of friends as they were hers. Apparently, they all have children which is frightening as we all ended or evenings at the 4 a.m. bar. How did we become responsible enough to have children? That�s right, I don�t have children, just dogs!

So, the wedding date draws near with 55 some days to go. The honeymoon, airfare, hotels, caterer, photographer and minister are all booked. Responses beginning to return and fill the mailbox. Second thought? Sometimes. I know I�m in a better place right now. My mind doesn�t realize I�m older and young girls aren�t attracted to me, yet I can�t help but look and wonder. Dating was easy, well not that easy. The hard part has just begun.

Yesterday - Tomorrow